Jessica Simpson was in India filming for her new reality show “The Price of Beauty.” We were going to write something snarky about her going native but others did a better job.

She’s also sporting a bindi which is the final nail in the coffin for her country music career because there are two things you don’t do in that genre: Be a minority or look like a terrorist. Now, I know what you’re thinking: India had absolutely nothing to do with 9/11, and you’re absolutely right. However, you’re employing things like book smarts and facts which, according to southern law, means Alan Jackson has the right to throw copies of the King James at your face until you drink a two-liter of Mountain Dew. Them’s the rules.

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